


My Beautiful Boy

by aegicheezu



Category: K-pop, SHINee
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Established JongMinKey, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, OnTae, Pining, Polyamory, Requited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-11-07
Packaged: 2019-08-20 09:33:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16553279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aegicheezu/pseuds/aegicheezu
Summary: Taemin isn’t sure about his new look – he thinks the long hair makes him look too feminine, an image he’s been trying to cast off for a while now. Too shy to bring it up with the stylists himself, he seeks out reassurance from his leader, who readily gives it. Taemin wants Jinki for other things, too – and his leader always obliges; he loves his baby, after all – and maybe it’s finally time to tell him.





	My Beautiful Boy

By the time the boys were finished at the salon, the sun had begun to dip in the sky – their managers had sent them off to get new looks in preparation for their upcoming single – and the boys were busy chattering away in the company car. Minho, having won kai bai bo, sat shotgun; Key and Jonghyun in the middle row of the small van; and Taemin and Jinki sat in the back, laughing at Key, playing supermodel and making Jonghyun snap photos. Taemin twirled pieces of his hair in one hand, and his leg bounced – a nervous tick. Jinki, ever observant, rested a hand on his maknae’s thigh to steady it.

“You look good, Taeminnie. You’re so pretty,” Jinki offered, smiling. “It’s really pretty on you. You’ll get used to the long hair soon, you won’t even notice it after a while.”

Taemin’s voice seemed far away. “Do you think I’m pretty, hyung?” he asked quietly. “Just… pretty?” he stared out the window. 

Jinki was puzzled by his maknae’s question. “You okay, Taeminnie?” His voice was soft, not wanting to draw attention. He smiled at his youngest, and squeezed his thigh. He remarked how sweet the younger boy smelled, the salon’s products in his hair and on his neck. It made him smile. 

Taemin was brought out of his reverie, and shook his head. “I’m fine, Jinki-hyung,” he smiled, but his eyes didn’t seem to match. “I’m just a little tired,” he added.

“Sitting in the salon chair for hours is pretty tiring,” Jinki laughed. “We’ll make something delicious to eat, and if you don’t feel like practicing, then we can just put it off until tomorrow. Okay?” he searched his maknae’s eyes.

“Okay,” Taemin replied, still unconvincingly. “I don’t think I’m up for hours of practice after all,” he looked out the window. “And it will be dark by the time we get home and eat.” He continued to bounce his leg under Jinki’s warm touch, making his heart beat a little faster.

Jinki couldn’t help but look at his maknae softly, wondering what was really on his mind. He sighed happily, not wanting Taemin to feel upset. “You’re right,” Jinki smiled. He raised his voice a little to address everyone else, “Hey, let’s eat a big homemade dinner tonight,” he announced. “We’ll rest tonight, and practice tomorrow. What do you guys think?”

“Ah, our leader is so wise!” Key crooned jokingly, laughing and passing back an open bag of gummy bears towards the oldest for him to take some and share with Taemin. A chorus of agreement rippled through the car, making Taemin laugh in earnest at last.

 

*  
  


Jinki could not sleep; he kept tossing and turning in bed, unable to rest. Something was nagging at him; he couldn’t get what Taemin had said out of his mind. _“Do you think I’m pretty, hyung?” “Just… pretty?”_ Jinki shook his head, bothered.

“Of course you’re pretty, Taeminnie,” he muttered quietly to himself. “You always look so beautiful, to me,” he rolled onto his side and let out a heavy sigh.

As if Taemin had felt his ears burning, he stirred in his bed and rolled onto his side. Wondering what time it was and squinting hard to read the digital clock, he slipped from his bed and noiselessly made his way to the kitchen where he poured himself a glass of water. Running a careful hand through his now-long hair, he sighed.

“What is it, Taeminnie?” Jinki’s gentle voice surprised him, and he spun around to face his leader. Jinki took the glass from Taemin’s hand and sipped. “Can’t sleep either?” He coaxed Taemin back against the counter and rested his chin against the young man’s shoulder.

“It’s nothing, really,” Taemin rested a gentle hand on his leader’s waist. “It’s stupid.”

“What is?” Jinki pressed. “You were so quiet, all day. You barely ate at dinner, too.”

“You noticed that?” Taemin was surprised, looking up at Jinki.

Jinki squeezed Taemin’s cheek, teasingly. “I see everything, Taeminnie,” he smiled. “Come on, tell me what’s on your mind. Come with me,” he took Taemin’s hand and led him to his room, leaving the moonlit kitchen in a quiet stillness. Taemin allowed himself to be gently pulled into his leader’s room, warmth radiating from the point on his wrist where Jinki held on.

Taemin was not a stranger to the older boy’s room, though it was only recently that they were moved into a larger dorm and were given their own space. He had grown so used to being able to roll over and wrap his arms around the sleeping form of his leader while they slept that he kept up that habit, and would crawl into Jinki’s room in the middle of the night. Jinki never questioned it, always welcoming the young man into his bed and letting him curl into his arms. Tonight though, something really was on his mind; and for once, he felt bashful, unwilling to tell the truth. Oblivious to the maknae’s internal struggle, Jinki sat Taemin down on his bed and began to rub gentle circles on his back.

“Taeminnie, what’s been on your mind today?” Jinki asked softly. “It’s not like you to be so quiet,” he coaxes the young man’s head against his shoulder. He added, “The others will notice too, you know, if you’re not careful, baby.”

Taemin nodded, knowing that Jinki was right. He sighed. “Jinki-hyung, when you look at me, what do you see?” he asked at last, straightening up and facing the older boy.

Jinki thought for a moment, but his answer came quickly. “I see a wonderful dancer and singer, who works hard and loves his members very much,” he ruffled Taemin’s hair. “I see a young man with a beautiful smile, who still likes to crawl into his leader’s bed at night when he can’t sleep.” He drew the young boy close and embraced him. “What’s made you get so philosophical?”

Taemin sighed again. “Do you think I’ll ever be handsome, one day?” he asked, voice small. The question seemed silly to him, and he almost regretted asking it. “Or do you think… do you think I’ll always be just… pretty?” Taemin withdrew from his leader’s embrace and looked down at his hands. “The stylist kept on saying, ‘oh, how pretty you look!’ while she fit my extensions in, and it’s true, this long hair makes me look so feminine… the comments on SNS already compare me to a pretty girl, hyung… what if I don’t want to be just ‘pretty’ anymore? I want to be seen as a man, a handsome man. When will people start to treat me like that?”

Jinki’s eyes softened. _So, it really does bother you, doesn’t it?_ He drew the young man close again and felt his maknae relax into his frame. “Taeminnie, you _are_ handsome,” he reassured, stroking his back. “Don’t take the comments to heart, baby. Being so charming is part of your appeal, it’s why so many people love you.” Taemin exhaled again, Jinki’s words making him feel at least a little better. Jinki repeated, “so many people love you just as you are.”

Taemin felt his heartbeat quicken at the repetition of the word ‘love,’ and swallowed hard. He suddenly wondered about something. “Jinki-hyung,” he ventured slowly, tone unsure, but curious, “Do _you_ love me… too?”

Taemin felt the older boy seem to freeze, his muscles tense a little at the bluntness of his question. But the tension in his leader’s body soon melted away, and Jinki broke their embrace to be able to better look Taemin in the eye. He took Taemin’s cheek and cupped it in his hand, thumb gently stroking the younger’s soft skin.

“You must know how I feel about you, my silly Taeminnie…” Jinki whispered, feeling his heart beating faster, looking him in the eye with a soft expression that seemed to say, ‘ _don’t you know my heart by now?’_ He sighed.

Taemin breathed in deeply and shut his eyes for a moment before opening them, eyes full of resolve. “Tell me, hyung. Tell me that you love me…” he brought his face imperceptibly closer, and looked at Jinki’s full lips. “Don’t you…?” He looked back up into Jinki’s eyes through his own long lashes, hoping he hadn’t made a mistake.

Jinki, too, brought his face closer. “I do love you, Taeminnie…” he said at last, snaking his arms around his maknae’s neck and pressing their foreheads together, trying to calm his heart. “I love you more than anything in the world.” He looked to the young boy, searching his eyes for the thing he now needed to hear the most.

Taemin’s heart fluttered at Jinki’s confession and he exhaled, relieved. “Jinki-hyung,” he ventured further, “I love you too… I have loved you, since the start of everything. Can I kiss you… please?” his mouth curled into a smile that he could not supress. Jinki, too, seemed unable to contain his feelings and smiled back.

 _He loves me, too…_ Jinki’s heart nearly burst to finally know his maknae’s true feelings. “Kiss me, Taeminnie,” he whispered against the young boy’s mouth. “Please, kiss me.”

Taemin did as he was told, and pressed his lips to Jinki’s; softly, tentatively, but with purpose. Jinki felt a warmth spread from their kiss all throughout his body, and he held his maknae close.

The moon, oblivious to their confessions, continued its slow dip in the sky.

 

*

 

The next morning, as usual, the members rose from a very deep sleep and made their way to the shared kitchen for breakfast before their scheduled practice. Taking their places at the table or fussing around in the kitchen, they milled around each other with a practiced ease. Taemin stood by the kettle waiting for water to boil, and he began to play with his long hair, this time with a smile on his face. Key, maneuvering past him to grab a handful of grapes, asked, “So, Taeminnie, how do you like your new hair?” he ran a hand over his own, newly-shorn style and smiled. “I’m still not used to how cold my head feels now!” he laughed.

Taemin laughed along with him, and reached a hand out to feel the buzz-cut on one side of Key’s head. “Actually, I think I like my new hair a lot,” he said at last, smiling. “I wasn’t sure about it yesterday, but… I do like it. It makes me look pretty, don’t you think?” He smiled at Jinki, who winked back.

Jonghyun, oblivious to their silent conversation, wrapped his arms around Taemin’s shoulders from behind and cooed, “Our precious maknae is the most beautiful boy in the world!” he pinched Taemin’s cheeks. “Isn’t he, hyung?” he asked Jinki, who nodded in agreement. Just then, Minho finally emerged from his room rubbing the sleep from his eyes, and kissing Key and Jonghyun on the cheek as a morning greeting.

“What are we talking about, so loudly?” Minho asked, clearly still sleepy. He wrapped his arms around Key’s waist, resting his chin on Key’s shoulder as he attempted to cook breakfast.

Jinki smiled at Taemin and replied, “we’re telling our Taeminnie how beautiful he is,” he answered matter-of-factly, sipping his coffee.

The boys laughed together, unaware that something had changed forever between their leader and his beloved maknae. As they sat together to eat, under the table, Taemin reached for Jinki’s hand. The older boy took it, lacing their fingers together, and squeezed.


End file.
